Monday, April 18, 2005

And now a word from our sponsor

Announcer: New From Parentco, the newest My Little Pony addition!

Dad comes in and trips. Stands up cussing. Picks up Pinkie Pie and yells to daughter: Jesse GET DOWN HERE!

Jesse runs to daddy and gives him a big hug on the leg: Daddy! You're Home! I Lub You!

Dad, shows Pinkie Pie to Jesse: Pinkie Pie was on the floor again

Jesse, scolding: Bad Pinkie Pie! You need to go to your room!

Dad correcting Jesse: No, Jesse. It's time for Pinkie Pie to go to a special place

Scene switches. Both are sitting in front of big black box with a chute on one side, a switch in the middle and a spout on the other side.

Jesse: Daddy, what's this?

Dad: This is the My Little Pony Glue Factory. Watch, we'll shove Pinkie Pie in here.

Dad stuffs Pinkie Pie into the chute.

Dad smiling and talking into : Now listen. First they shoot her.

A loud bang comes from the box.

Jesse in a whimpering voice: Pinkie Pie?

Announcer in loud excited voice: Every My Little Pony Glue Factory comes complete with 1000 watt bulb guaranteed to melt any sized pony in under a minute.

Box lights up.

Dad: Now, they put her into the vat and make the glue

Light in box continues to shine.

Ooze comes out the side.

Dad in a smiling happy voice: See, it’s a Pinkie Pie glue stick!!! Isn’t that great? Now she won’t be in the middle of the floor!

Jesse: PINKIE PIE! NOOOOO! I can still see her ear.

Dad: Yeah you can. I guess it needed more melt time. Hey, look, Mintie has a limp!

Jesse: No daddy, No!

Fade out and in to new scene.

Dad holding Darth Vader action figure: JASON! Get down here.

Announcer with lawyer voice:
My Little Pony is a registered trademark of the Hasbro Corporation. Not recommended for children. Do not show product to boys as they will want to melt everything in site. Glue sticks from machine will not work in glue guns. Not responsible for house fires, counseling and/or therapy for children scarred by trauma of seeing Pinkie Pie melted.